"Ladies & Gentleman, We Have Now Reached Cruising Altitude."

Let's talk about airline uniforms for a minute.  Of course they look nice, what guy doesn't like a cute, thin lady bringing him a cocktail in a short skirt/dress while he is on his way to meet his friends at the beach? But what most people who are not airline professionals don't know about this uniform is this: it comes with a warning label. Yes. A warning label. This uniform has serious side effects. It will cause you and your family to believe that Christmas is no longer on December 25th. Sometimes it will make you miss family and church events, reunions, and most weekends.  Even the pilots uniforms. Some have even claimed that it has aphrodisiac like qualities. So I have been told. It will even make you miss your child's birth or daughter's prom. It will cause you to sleep with your cell phone on loud, waiting for the call saying "You have an hour to report to the airport". It will cause you to leave a suit case in your car at all times, packed for both hot and cold weather. For some odd reason, these uniforms will make you leave your home and drive in ice, snow, rain, wind, or even tornadoes all just to catch your flight that should have been canceled but wasn't. People will look at you like a crazy person as you are running barefoot in this uniform from gate to gate to make your next departure. Sometimes your spouse has to learn to become a single parent when raising children because you will be gone for days at a time. It will make you gain weight because you are confined to fast food restaurants in the airport. You can find yourself spending most of your nights in a empty hotel room with crumbs left in the bed from the flight attendant/pilot from the night before. Your feet. Yah, you can kiss those babies goodbye!! And your friends. Your friends will soon to think you have forgotten about them. They will stop calling and find that the only way to keep in touch is through facebook. They think that you are out at the beach having so much!! Little do they know... So. Think being a flight attendant/pilot is still all the glam it puts out to be? Before you put on this uniform, I suggest that you read the warning label fully because it is all true. It holds nothing back! And the next time you pass someone in the uniform, think twice before calling them "just a waitress in the sky"........